he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
After a beer I realize now I may have shared too much about my obsession with ghosts with my therapist this morning.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize