hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
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