If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Me. At least after what I've been through.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
