weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
this weekend will be like the season finale to my life
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
he has a knack for choosing the worst time to masturbate
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize