sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
if I'm ever single again, I swear to god I'm going to have 87 venerial diseases
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize
