yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
I lost my vibrator temporarily and for some unknown reason my first thought was that you might have stolen it. But then I realized you would never do that because you know it keeps me from killing people. But I am overtired and lacking in faith.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
