Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
