every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
