They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
im wtih 32a right now bc 34d is on her period. now i know how girls feel when their hookups go from magnums to regulars
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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