I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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