why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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