she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
Randomize
