I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
She loves introducing her friends to my foreskin.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Randomize
