Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
He went down on me while I was on the phone with my grandma.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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