remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
Let's just say if my bucket list had "fngered in the middle of a club by a complete stranger while being sprayed by UV paint" then that is well and truly ticked off.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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