Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
If you can get laid in a rudolph onesie you are doing something right my friend.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Randomize
