Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
