You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Remember the golden rule, wine is for baths, and beer is for showers.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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