8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Then mom squeezed my boob and said, "Dad would go nuts if I had these..."
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
