yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize
