nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
During breaking dawn, he leaned over and asked me why she would have to worry about her period since she essentially just married a walking super-absorbant tampon... It was the best way to ruin those movies for me.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
Randomize
