Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
Reggie can tackle my bush.
How's work?
Spinning.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
Randomize
