the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
how was last night?
i woke up with my hand stuck in a jam jar with my keys in the bottom and a dog licking peanut butter off my boobs. you tell me.
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
