:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
