community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
Randomize
