Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
My dream in life is to scissor with Ellen. I don't care if I've got a dick. I'll make it work.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
Randomize
