I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
Randomize
