You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
Never let your siblings swipe right.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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