Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
Randomize
