I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I just woke up with a girl who has left and right tattoed on her wrists. In french. I may need to stop drinking.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
still finding ketchup in my shoes. thanks to graduation that is probably the last time ill ever say that..
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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