I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
