I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
