this beer tastes like vomit already
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Randomize
