What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Randomize
