Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Randomize
