nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I walked in on my roommate finishing watching something on his computer. There was cum all over his screen. He awkwardly said hi and pulled up his pants.
It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
Randomize
