the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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