you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
