Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize