I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
It was just a Craigslist hook up but she wore sweats. Where are the girls with class?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
You were just laying there on the air mattress watching spongebob with a knife. We tried to take it from you, but you insisted it was your emergency escape in case you started to float off.
Randomize