marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Randomize
