My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
Man I just realized that my only life problem right now is that I have to convince myself not to fuck a 19-y-o
Randomize
