he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
