but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
Can we smoke pot out of a menorah?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize
