none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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