It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Randomize
