im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
