Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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