He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
needless to say, I hope she has to get an abortion again
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
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dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
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