Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I'm drunk in your building find me and we can have sex.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
He serenaded me a cappella to Ed Sheeran. I wasn't going to leave his dick unsucked.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Randomize
